Everyone eventually gets to the stage in their life where their parents start getting elderly.
It normally comes as a shock to us but it is inevitable, and then we need to start helping them with things that they helped us with when we were kids.
A massive turnaround in our lives, but the path can be smoothed by good planning, lots of patience and some creativity.
A friend of mine lately set up an easy-care home for her ageing parents, so that they could continue to be independent but would not have as much work to do on their house.
She gave me some pointers to share with you today on how you can help your parents make this transition.
Help them find a home in an area they wish to live.
For some parents this will be a home close by to the area in which they lived before.
Others will want to move nearer to you, or another of their children or grandchildren.
Others may wish to live closer to a good friend or maybe a centre which has health care or a shopping centre they can easily access within a short distance.
Don't just go and find them a place that YOU think is good for them, because this will get everyone off on the wrong foot from the start.
It is better to simply assist them in this huge change in their lives so that they can retain as much autonomy and independence as possible.
Set them up with the things they will need inside their new home that they didn't have before.
For instance, they may want to change things such as which rooms and hallways are lighted, they may want a stairlift or an assistance tool for getting in and out of the shower.
They may want a new larger TV or a large wall clock, or even large changes such as a doorway widened for a wheelchair if your parent/s need this tool.
It all comes down to what they need.
Help them sort out their old possessions and choose which things they will take with them to their new home if they are downsizing.
Respect their wishes and don't tell them what to do, this is a hard step in life for anyone to take.
Arrange the move for them and help them set everything up in their new home the way they want it to be.
Remember that they may need your help even more at first as they become accustomed to their new home, they may need adjustments to the way furniture is arranged or they may need extra help with transport etc.
It is a brave step for people to acknowledge that they are becoming older and if you respect your parents and don't become bossy or judgmental about how they should change or how they should live their lives, no doubt it will make the relationship easier and ideally everyone will be happier for this change for the better in the new phase of life.
It normally comes as a shock to us but it is inevitable, and then we need to start helping them with things that they helped us with when we were kids.
A massive turnaround in our lives, but the path can be smoothed by good planning, lots of patience and some creativity.
A friend of mine lately set up an easy-care home for her ageing parents, so that they could continue to be independent but would not have as much work to do on their house.
She gave me some pointers to share with you today on how you can help your parents make this transition.
Help them find a home in an area they wish to live.
For some parents this will be a home close by to the area in which they lived before.
Others will want to move nearer to you, or another of their children or grandchildren.
Others may wish to live closer to a good friend or maybe a centre which has health care or a shopping centre they can easily access within a short distance.
Don't just go and find them a place that YOU think is good for them, because this will get everyone off on the wrong foot from the start.
It is better to simply assist them in this huge change in their lives so that they can retain as much autonomy and independence as possible.
Set them up with the things they will need inside their new home that they didn't have before.
For instance, they may want to change things such as which rooms and hallways are lighted, they may want a stairlift or an assistance tool for getting in and out of the shower.
They may want a new larger TV or a large wall clock, or even large changes such as a doorway widened for a wheelchair if your parent/s need this tool.
It all comes down to what they need.
Help them sort out their old possessions and choose which things they will take with them to their new home if they are downsizing.
Respect their wishes and don't tell them what to do, this is a hard step in life for anyone to take.
Arrange the move for them and help them set everything up in their new home the way they want it to be.
Remember that they may need your help even more at first as they become accustomed to their new home, they may need adjustments to the way furniture is arranged or they may need extra help with transport etc.
It is a brave step for people to acknowledge that they are becoming older and if you respect your parents and don't become bossy or judgmental about how they should change or how they should live their lives, no doubt it will make the relationship easier and ideally everyone will be happier for this change for the better in the new phase of life.
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