10 Flirting Guidelines For Men - Always Keep Your Goal In Mind!
So you wish to find out how to flirt? Before we get into the top 10 flirting guidelines for men, let's first have a look at exactly how you ought to approach an interaction with a girl if you really want to be successful.
Flirting isn't about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner. When it's done appropriately, flirting is a way for a guy and a girl to learn whether they're attracted to each other.
Flirting is not impressing her!
To begin with, your goal is not to impress her or to show off. This is the part about flirting that men mess up the most. Flirting is not about showing off! If you hear a guy talking to a girl about his expensive car, his executive job, or his massive bank account, he might believe he's flirting but he's in fact trying to impress her, and probably failing at that.
In truth, flirting isn't really about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner.
Exactly what is flirting then?
When it's done right, flirting is a means for a guy and a girl to find out whether they're attracted to each other.
Here's the thing. If you approach a girl and say, "Hello, you're cute, want to come home with me?" - that isn't flirting. It's being incredibly direct and forward. It bypasses all the build-up of the mating ritual and will generally turn a girl off.
However, if you walk up to a woman, smile at her, get her to laugh, make great eye contact, and possibly wink... all this things conveys interest to her.
While communicating interest is good, you don't want to stop there. You want your flirting to not just let her know that you're interested, but you also want to learn whether she's going to return your interest.
If she does return it, it's an excellent sign, keep going! If not, you need to choose quickly whether you should alter tactics or walk away.
Always remember exactly what your goal is.
Basically, as a man your goal is to convey two things in your flirting:
1) Your masculinity
2) Your self-confidence
Girls find both of these characteristics very attractive. Communicate them indirectly and non-verbally, and you'll have girls feeling warm and tingly when they think of you. Women are empathetic and emotional creatures - they react to feelings and strong emotions. So if you convey your confidence and your male sexuality when you flirt, girls WILL respond!
Okay... now that's out of the way, let's get into the:
TOP 10 FLIRTING GUIDELINES FOR GUYS
1) Kick off your interaction with energy!
Greet people in a cheerful, spirited, but above all, energetic way. The very first impression is key, and it's a lot more difficult to kick off your interaction in a low-energy way and build up than it is to begin full of energy and let things settle down.
The more energy you have at the start, the more ready she'll be to let herself to be carried away by your energy.
Yes, you can have too much energy, and come across like a nut. Do not do that. Adjust your energy level suitable to the situation. You need to be just a little bit more energetic than she is, though not too much more. Entering a relaxed dinner discussion like you're on the dance floor at a nightclub is not going to work.
2) Make good eye contact.
Few things communicate your confidence better than making direct eye contact. Always look her in the eyes, and hold eye contact longer than what is generally considered comfortable in typical situations.
A solid gaze is commonly quite seductive, and helps create a strong connection between the 2 of you.
3) Use her name in your conversation.
When you repeat a woman's name while speaking to her does several things:
First, it shows the girl that you're actually making an effort to use her name and remember it.
In a subtle way, it helps create familiarity and comfort when you mention someone's name while talking to them. If you do this, she will feel comfortable and familiar with you instantly!
4) Ask questions, but do it correctly.
Girls love talking about themselves, and it's good to show some interest in her. However, do not overdo it since it's easy to come off as putting too much value on her. So don't make that error.
Be interested in her, and collect some details to identify common interests in between you two. Commonalities that you can utilize to develop additional connection.
For example, if she mentions having been to Hong Kong and you've been there as well, you can relate to that and begin discussing your own adventures there. This will help create a strong emotional connection.
5) Talk about your life experiences.
Just like with the Hong Kong example, sharing experiences you've experienced and adventures you have had helps form her thoughts of you and catches her imagination. By sharing specific stories, you can direct her opinion of you and have her believe exactly what you want her to believe about you.
6) Use flattery.
There is an old saying, "Flattery will get you everywhere!" And undoubtedly, women enjoy it when men say flattering things about them - as long as it's real and original.
You do not want to seem insincere or find yourself caught in a lie, or go around compromising your integrity by giving out compliments for things you do not truly find attractive. even more important, you don't want to be giving the same compliments everyone else does - then you just look like everyone else!
Simply put, if you can tell she gets compliments on her smile all the time, find something a bit more unique to compliment. Like possibly how her smile makes her eyes crinkle in a charming way.
The secret to flattery is to set yourself apart from every nerd complimenting her on the exact same smile.
7) Once in a while, whisper.
Do this in such a way that it fits the context, of course, but there are few things more sexy and flirtatious than whispering. Leaning in to someone and lowering your voice builds an aura of intimacy that can not be resisted. In fact, the closer you get when whispering, the greater the level of intimacy and the stronger the emotional connection.
8) Fill your voice with self-confidence.
The last thing you want to do while flirting is to come off as not sure, insecure, or scared. Be secure in yourself and your knowledge.
If she says something you disagree with, don't hesitate to set the record straight or get into a light argument if you need to. Provided you don't go overboard, women react well to self-confidence and male aggression.
9) Use nicknames.
When you give a name to something, you are symbolically conveying ownership over it. So when you give a nickname to a woman, you are concurrently establishing your dominance of the communication and building an image she needs to live up to.
For instance, if she is cute and shy, you can call her hello kitty. Tease her and make some jokes on it. Soon, she'll come to associate hello kitty with you and try to live up to the cute image solely for you.
10) leave her wanting for more.
You don't want to exhaust everything in your flirting toolbox right away, so change between flirting and not flirting. Flirting continually comes off as too strong, and it might be hard for you to keep putting that much energy into your interaction. Switching keeps you from wearing out even as it keeps the interaction going.
Also, it permits you to extend the communication so when it's time to part ways, she'll still be interested in hearing more from you. A lot of guys will begin the flirting with high energy and let the energy drop so by the end, the woman has gotten her fill of you.
So always end your flirting on a high note that leaves her wanting more!
Flirting isn't about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner. When it's done appropriately, flirting is a way for a guy and a girl to learn whether they're attracted to each other.
Flirting is not impressing her!
To begin with, your goal is not to impress her or to show off. This is the part about flirting that men mess up the most. Flirting is not about showing off! If you hear a guy talking to a girl about his expensive car, his executive job, or his massive bank account, he might believe he's flirting but he's in fact trying to impress her, and probably failing at that.
In truth, flirting isn't really about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner.
Exactly what is flirting then?
When it's done right, flirting is a means for a guy and a girl to find out whether they're attracted to each other.
Here's the thing. If you approach a girl and say, "Hello, you're cute, want to come home with me?" - that isn't flirting. It's being incredibly direct and forward. It bypasses all the build-up of the mating ritual and will generally turn a girl off.
However, if you walk up to a woman, smile at her, get her to laugh, make great eye contact, and possibly wink... all this things conveys interest to her.
While communicating interest is good, you don't want to stop there. You want your flirting to not just let her know that you're interested, but you also want to learn whether she's going to return your interest.
If she does return it, it's an excellent sign, keep going! If not, you need to choose quickly whether you should alter tactics or walk away.
Always remember exactly what your goal is.
Basically, as a man your goal is to convey two things in your flirting:
1) Your masculinity
2) Your self-confidence
Girls find both of these characteristics very attractive. Communicate them indirectly and non-verbally, and you'll have girls feeling warm and tingly when they think of you. Women are empathetic and emotional creatures - they react to feelings and strong emotions. So if you convey your confidence and your male sexuality when you flirt, girls WILL respond!
Okay... now that's out of the way, let's get into the:
TOP 10 FLIRTING GUIDELINES FOR GUYS
1) Kick off your interaction with energy!
Greet people in a cheerful, spirited, but above all, energetic way. The very first impression is key, and it's a lot more difficult to kick off your interaction in a low-energy way and build up than it is to begin full of energy and let things settle down.
The more energy you have at the start, the more ready she'll be to let herself to be carried away by your energy.
Yes, you can have too much energy, and come across like a nut. Do not do that. Adjust your energy level suitable to the situation. You need to be just a little bit more energetic than she is, though not too much more. Entering a relaxed dinner discussion like you're on the dance floor at a nightclub is not going to work.
2) Make good eye contact.
Few things communicate your confidence better than making direct eye contact. Always look her in the eyes, and hold eye contact longer than what is generally considered comfortable in typical situations.
A solid gaze is commonly quite seductive, and helps create a strong connection between the 2 of you.
3) Use her name in your conversation.
When you repeat a woman's name while speaking to her does several things:
First, it shows the girl that you're actually making an effort to use her name and remember it.
In a subtle way, it helps create familiarity and comfort when you mention someone's name while talking to them. If you do this, she will feel comfortable and familiar with you instantly!
4) Ask questions, but do it correctly.
Girls love talking about themselves, and it's good to show some interest in her. However, do not overdo it since it's easy to come off as putting too much value on her. So don't make that error.
Be interested in her, and collect some details to identify common interests in between you two. Commonalities that you can utilize to develop additional connection.
For example, if she mentions having been to Hong Kong and you've been there as well, you can relate to that and begin discussing your own adventures there. This will help create a strong emotional connection.
5) Talk about your life experiences.
Just like with the Hong Kong example, sharing experiences you've experienced and adventures you have had helps form her thoughts of you and catches her imagination. By sharing specific stories, you can direct her opinion of you and have her believe exactly what you want her to believe about you.
6) Use flattery.
There is an old saying, "Flattery will get you everywhere!" And undoubtedly, women enjoy it when men say flattering things about them - as long as it's real and original.
You do not want to seem insincere or find yourself caught in a lie, or go around compromising your integrity by giving out compliments for things you do not truly find attractive. even more important, you don't want to be giving the same compliments everyone else does - then you just look like everyone else!
Simply put, if you can tell she gets compliments on her smile all the time, find something a bit more unique to compliment. Like possibly how her smile makes her eyes crinkle in a charming way.
The secret to flattery is to set yourself apart from every nerd complimenting her on the exact same smile.
7) Once in a while, whisper.
Do this in such a way that it fits the context, of course, but there are few things more sexy and flirtatious than whispering. Leaning in to someone and lowering your voice builds an aura of intimacy that can not be resisted. In fact, the closer you get when whispering, the greater the level of intimacy and the stronger the emotional connection.
8) Fill your voice with self-confidence.
The last thing you want to do while flirting is to come off as not sure, insecure, or scared. Be secure in yourself and your knowledge.
If she says something you disagree with, don't hesitate to set the record straight or get into a light argument if you need to. Provided you don't go overboard, women react well to self-confidence and male aggression.
9) Use nicknames.
When you give a name to something, you are symbolically conveying ownership over it. So when you give a nickname to a woman, you are concurrently establishing your dominance of the communication and building an image she needs to live up to.
For instance, if she is cute and shy, you can call her hello kitty. Tease her and make some jokes on it. Soon, she'll come to associate hello kitty with you and try to live up to the cute image solely for you.
10) leave her wanting for more.
You don't want to exhaust everything in your flirting toolbox right away, so change between flirting and not flirting. Flirting continually comes off as too strong, and it might be hard for you to keep putting that much energy into your interaction. Switching keeps you from wearing out even as it keeps the interaction going.
Also, it permits you to extend the communication so when it's time to part ways, she'll still be interested in hearing more from you. A lot of guys will begin the flirting with high energy and let the energy drop so by the end, the woman has gotten her fill of you.
So always end your flirting on a high note that leaves her wanting more!
Source...