After you become fifty, "the best is yet to come" seems to be the only logical attitude to take-no matter what one's past has been; no matter what awaits.
Deeply believing this truism inspired me to start a dating site for us-the fiftyplusers.
What safer way to meet a potential friend or significant other than in a place where you can remain anonymous until you are ready to reveal yourself? What better way to get to know someone than through the written word? The site is still relatively new, but I've learned a lot already.
First, meeting online is a lot like meeting someone offline.
It takes time and patience.
You have to be pro-active.
What I've learned about our demographic is that there is a lot of passivity.
People sign on, and that's that.
They wait.
They wait for someone to contact them.
This is a big mistake and the primary reason why some people complain that they can't meet anyone online.
Like life, if you want to make something happen, you have to take action, yourself.
There is a lot of talk about online dating safety.
Like offline dating, you have to be careful.
Long before the birth of the internet, people were lying to each other; people were scamming each other.
And yes, it happens online too.
Like offline, you have to be smart.
You don't give people you don't know money.
You wait until you get to know someone very well before you fall in love.
You meet for the first time in a public place.
You tell your best friend where you are going and call when you return home.
You take advantage of the anonymity, and continue to meet in public places until you are confident that the person is who they say they are.
You don't give anyone you don't know well your personal information.
Personal information now includes your e-mail address, as well as your phone number and home address.
Most sites, mine included, have a link you can use to block an unwanted site user.
If you suspect someone is on the site for illegitimate reasons.
Block this user.
If you are on my site, please get in touch with me (the number is on the site) and let me know.
I've taken several people off the site.
One report is all I need.
A big complaint about dating online is that people don't look like the photos they post.
In my opinion, people just want a chance to find a relationship.
The biggest complaint is about weight.
With a good relationship, perhaps the person could loose the weight.
The happiest people in relationships that I know have looked deeper than physical attraction.
Of course, there needs to be some physical attraction, but it doesn't have to be the only important attribute of a person.
There are some very smart, funny, intelligent people who are also over-weight.
There are some very stupid, miserly, nasty, skinny people.
We need to stay open-minded and open-hearted.
Weight is something that can be lost.
Also, I think people seriously looking for companionship and love need to loosen up a bit on their criteria for finding that suitable mate.
Is it really necessary that they love to kayak? Do they have to cook? Isn't finding someone to be with (as a friend, or lover) more important than any single activity? Relating is what's important.
There are all sorts of clubs, these days, where you can find people to do things with.
Another issue on dating sites is married people.
Marriage is one of the categories we do allow on the site.
Also, we put this fact right up front on the Profile.
There are a few reasons for this.
One reason is that people (frankly, mostly men, but some women too) lie.
We figured that if we allow people to tell the truth, maybe they will.
The fact that the person is married is put right up front on the Profile.
Also, in our age group, many people have spouses who are incapacitated.
I was having lunch with a woman whose husband had been in the hospital for six months.
She asked if the site could please include married people.
She said she would just love to find someone to have a meal with, or a companion for a movie.
I've had calls from people whose mates had Alzheimer's Disease and other debilitating conditions.
There are valid reasons a married person would sign up on a dating site.
Deeply believing this truism inspired me to start a dating site for us-the fiftyplusers.
What safer way to meet a potential friend or significant other than in a place where you can remain anonymous until you are ready to reveal yourself? What better way to get to know someone than through the written word? The site is still relatively new, but I've learned a lot already.
First, meeting online is a lot like meeting someone offline.
It takes time and patience.
You have to be pro-active.
What I've learned about our demographic is that there is a lot of passivity.
People sign on, and that's that.
They wait.
They wait for someone to contact them.
This is a big mistake and the primary reason why some people complain that they can't meet anyone online.
Like life, if you want to make something happen, you have to take action, yourself.
There is a lot of talk about online dating safety.
Like offline dating, you have to be careful.
Long before the birth of the internet, people were lying to each other; people were scamming each other.
And yes, it happens online too.
Like offline, you have to be smart.
You don't give people you don't know money.
You wait until you get to know someone very well before you fall in love.
You meet for the first time in a public place.
You tell your best friend where you are going and call when you return home.
You take advantage of the anonymity, and continue to meet in public places until you are confident that the person is who they say they are.
You don't give anyone you don't know well your personal information.
Personal information now includes your e-mail address, as well as your phone number and home address.
Most sites, mine included, have a link you can use to block an unwanted site user.
If you suspect someone is on the site for illegitimate reasons.
Block this user.
If you are on my site, please get in touch with me (the number is on the site) and let me know.
I've taken several people off the site.
One report is all I need.
A big complaint about dating online is that people don't look like the photos they post.
In my opinion, people just want a chance to find a relationship.
The biggest complaint is about weight.
With a good relationship, perhaps the person could loose the weight.
The happiest people in relationships that I know have looked deeper than physical attraction.
Of course, there needs to be some physical attraction, but it doesn't have to be the only important attribute of a person.
There are some very smart, funny, intelligent people who are also over-weight.
There are some very stupid, miserly, nasty, skinny people.
We need to stay open-minded and open-hearted.
Weight is something that can be lost.
Also, I think people seriously looking for companionship and love need to loosen up a bit on their criteria for finding that suitable mate.
Is it really necessary that they love to kayak? Do they have to cook? Isn't finding someone to be with (as a friend, or lover) more important than any single activity? Relating is what's important.
There are all sorts of clubs, these days, where you can find people to do things with.
Another issue on dating sites is married people.
Marriage is one of the categories we do allow on the site.
Also, we put this fact right up front on the Profile.
There are a few reasons for this.
One reason is that people (frankly, mostly men, but some women too) lie.
We figured that if we allow people to tell the truth, maybe they will.
The fact that the person is married is put right up front on the Profile.
Also, in our age group, many people have spouses who are incapacitated.
I was having lunch with a woman whose husband had been in the hospital for six months.
She asked if the site could please include married people.
She said she would just love to find someone to have a meal with, or a companion for a movie.
I've had calls from people whose mates had Alzheimer's Disease and other debilitating conditions.
There are valid reasons a married person would sign up on a dating site.
Source...